Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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