Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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