All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
