Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I understand Curling. That high.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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