Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
