Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
