I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
