that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
