We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
