girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
