I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
