Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
