I smell stomach acid.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
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