I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
