uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
