I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
