Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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