do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
