About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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