Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
