i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
