okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize