the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Reggie can tackle my bush.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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