D3 body, D1 cock
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Randomize
