Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
