Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
organizing the empties. That sober.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
