Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize