so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Found your dick twin last night
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize