dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize