Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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