Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
