She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
