i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
