smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
