me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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