This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
