garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just gift wrapped bread.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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