I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i think i have herpe
just one?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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