Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
