Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Randomize
