K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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