I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
