i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
