she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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