How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
