His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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