Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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