No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
3pm strippers are depressing
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize