is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
