Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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