Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
